HARVEST: Autumn is the season of reaping what we’ve sown. As the air begins to steadily chill and our pace of outer activity begins to slow down, we have the opportunity to turn our attention inside, taking stock of the year’s many harvests.
I don’t know about you, but for myself and many of those around me there’s a powerful spirit of review going on right now around the areas of relationship, values and co-creation. How do you relate to yourself and those that matter most to you? What’s important to you now, and how might that have shifted over time? What we valued in our teens or twenties or thirties aren’t necessarily relevant to us where we are now, after all. And what is it that you feel you are being called to bring into our world through your various partnerships? We do need one other to helps us give birth to our dreams- Life is intrinsically interdependent.
What it doesn’t need to be, however, is codependent. That’s the shadow side of relationship, values and co-creation in which we look to another (or even a group of others) to provide us with our worth, power and permission to be.
This morning I was awakened by a surprise call from my ex in Korea after four years of no contact. We spoke for an hour and a half. It was strange and sad and comforting. All the feels. See, for three years, she and I explored the depths of codependency through and through and laid all of our darkest parts out on display. I almost didn’t survive it, in truth.
Although this was what I refer to now as my “Personal Dark Ages,” out of the manure of those shitty, painful times has grown the most transformative and joyful era of my life thus far, and I am reaping an unbelievably fruitful bounty on all levels this autumn. I am eternally grateful to her for the gift of turning the soil within me like that.
Although I’m feeling very naked as I type these words right now, I share this with you today because maybe you’ve been somewhere similar yourself or are in the midst of it now and I want you to know you’re not alone. No matter whether your harvest in 2019 in these areas of relationships, values and co-creation is bountiful or bitter, take heart, dear ones. Good things take time to grow.
READ: Unsurprisingly, Maria Popova at Brain Pickings also had her finger on this very same pulse this week because she shared some beautiful excerpts from Anne Lamott’s book, Almost Everything, that speak eloquently of the dance between love and despair.
“We have also known the abyss of love lost to death or rejection, and that it somehow leads to new life. We have been redeemed and saved by love, even as a few times we have been nearly destroyed, and worse, seen our children nearly destroyed. We are who we love, we are one, and we are autonomous.”
LISTEN: As I was writing this week’s installment, I was listening to Gregory Alan Isakov’s delicious new record, Evening Machines. I don’t know why exactly but it just sounds like a harvest-time record to me, somehow. One of my favorite cuts is “Caves.”
“did i hear something break
was that your heart or my heart
like when the earth shakes
then the silence that follows”
Make this week magnificent!